Monday, October 09, 2006

Profiles

I’d planned to venerate my son’s memory in a more modest fashion, but alas, I find myself tidying up my affairs (cleaning out my files), and look what I’ve happened upon.

This journey began for Steve over two years ago. He must have begun to involve me in it nearly a year ago. He’d thought of doing a book about Aaron and wanted to “know” him as much as possible.

Plop. Steve dropped out of sight (he’s been to more states and countries in this past week than most of us) and I really didn’t expect to hear from him again. Then pop, he's back. And he wasn’t going away this time, except to Iraq.

But this time. Different. Determined. Not strictly about Aaron. Not solely about the good things you guys are doing. But about something over there. We don’t know what and we know we sound a little odd. I don’t know. We’ll see where it all leads. Just like this. This blog was set up to interact with family and friends who have a stake in this (Steve’s life). Also for information, to help keep our objective clear and our biases out (we all have them you know), to share the “other” news, and a way to hone my writing skills (I’ve been blocked since April—bet you find that a little hard to believe, huh?)

But then something changed. Someone in the military responded, commented. I hadn’t expected that. Not just an added benefit, but pure pleasure. You don't have to thank us for our support, no, it should be the other way around.

Thank you.

I love you all. Again, you might think me strange for saying that, but it is true. And Steve does as well.

Steve tried to go back into the service. When the Army changed the age limit, he began to plan for it. Eight years prior service, heck, he was just slipping in. He took his ASVAB, scored 94 (he forgot to fill in 3 or 4 of them!). Had everything in order, journeyed the 4 hours to our home so that he could meet us in person before he left. He spent 3 days with us, slept in Aaron’s room, with Aaron’s dog, went through letters, pictures, again, his journalistic millions of questions, we said goodbye and I was already rubbing my hands together, mentally stuffing tiny tunas and packing precious proteins, cellophaned yes, but energy all the same. Toy treasures, etch-a-sketches the size of a postage stamp, socks galore, of course, and I coached him on the benefits of leaving off the skivvies while in the desert, I told him Bounce really worked, and oh, yes, you better take some of my Moqui Mud just in case you are stung, and quick, I better call Doug and tell him to make jerky and send, just like he did with Aaron…

Zingggg. Steve’s a vegetarian.

Zingggg again. St. Louis Meltdown. 3-4 months wait on the old DD214.

But his passport was here in a week. The direction changed. A Partnership was formed between me, my husband and Steve. Things may change again. We’ll see. We’re a bit more buoyant on the blog than in our emails. We understand this could be perilous, but yet, we (the three of us) want to push forward. If that is not God’s plan for us after all, then we must dump the mission.

Quote of the day: “And now you know the rest of the story.”

We covet your prayers.

**

And now, the letter I found.


October 26, 2005

Hi Steve,

Aaron was much more conservative than most people in the nation on some things. Such as abortion. He didn’t believe in it at all. He said to his brother Eric once: “It’s a belief man! It’s like believing in God…you either do or you don’t.” He wasn’t a fence straddler on anything that he felt strongly about. Aaron never registered to vote, but he did like President Bush. I really don’t know if Aaron would have ever registered to vote, not because he didn’t think people should, but he was just so darn busy all the time and hated filling out paperwork of any kind.

He wasn’t bigoted in any way at all. But he didn’t forget easy if you messed with him or anyone in his family or with the friends he cared so much about. He was a friend through and through and found himself in more than one scrape because of this—but he liked fighting. You could see the adrenalin coming through his pores just thinking about it.

Aaron’s greatest trait was his loyalty. He is three years younger than his cousin, Zach. Zach was a hero to him while Aaron was growing up. Aaron was playing JV football and doing pretty well, but when Zach quit his Senior year of football (after going through a few things of not playing as much as he wanted—and Zach was a stickler for “rules” while Aaron always found a way around them) then Aaron quit too. He was loyal to the bone, no matter the cost.

Aaron also had so much love in his heart. Sometimes, he wore his heart on his sleeve because of this. He was also jealous when “in love.”

Aaron loved to have money, so even as a youngster, he worked hard to have money. He loved name brands and was perhaps too easily impressed with nice things, but he’d give away his last nickel. He did time and time again. He had a hard time saving because of this, but I believe he was blessed in many ways because of this trait. But he was always broke.

Aaron loved people and always made the “little guys” feel good about themselves, but whoever he didn’t like probably was ribbed a lot by Aaron. He stayed in trouble at school due to lack of caring (until graduation!) and so he barely graduated. But he made it by the skin of his teeth, although when living with his dad, he was an A student. With Mom, he could get by with anything because of his charm. He had more charm than anyone I’ve ever known and I think that’s the thing I miss the most. He was so full of light; my sister always said he had a Tom Cruise smile.

Aaron loved Jesus and he loved to party. He put a great deal of effort into partying and he put a great deal into worship. He was charismatic.

Conflict between people he cared about upset him the most. He was very hurt over his dad’s and my relationship for many years (though we are perfectly fine since Aaron joined the Marines, and especially since we lost him). But any arguing within the family greatly upset him and he would not allow anything ugly said about anyone he loved. He loved Jerrod, his best friend, as much as he loved his dad and me. When he took leave, he divided it up between me, Doug and Jerrod. He also left me a note on how to distribute the life insurance money should anything happen to him. The insurance was divided like the leave. He always took care of Jerrod. He wanted Jerrod in college, even though he didn’t care to go.

Aaron loved working-out. And he was fast! He ran the 400 meter dash at full speed. And he smoked. Zach used to get upset because he’d never smoked, watched his diet/sleep, all the rules, and Aaron didn’t do that, and he would stay toe to toe with Zach in the 400 meter race.

His familial relationships were accepted “as is.” He took all of us as we were and never said too many negative things about us to the other, even when he was very upset. He was always respectful to me, teased me, charmed me—all those kinds of things. His relationship with his dad was fun a lot of the time, but his dad was the disciplinarian. His dad raised him from age 3-14 (except for a year and a half that he and his dad lived with me in Panama while I was in the Army). When Aaron hit his rebellious age, he came to live with me and visited his dad. I think they talked on the phone for a few minutes every day after he was at Camp Pendleton. With me it was a couple of times a week, because I wanted to “talk so long.”

His family was so important to him. But perhaps the thing Aaron wanted most was a child of his own. He loved kids and they always loved him. His nieces and nephews, his younger cousin, Kayla De’on, who’s now 12, they were particularly important to him. He called her “Little Pretty” and guarded over her. She would’ve had a hard time in her dating years if Aaron were here.

He was close with his brothers, too. He and Eric are a lot alike, even though Eric is about 36, now. They all had a tattoo—Austin Bros.

He was proud to be an Austin. They all have pretty domineering and powerful personalities. His grandpa (Austin) had been with LAPD, worked vice, then the sheriff’s department. Chuck Austin preceded Aaron in death Sept. 2003. Aaron was big-time upset and gave the eulogy at Chuck’s funeral. Loud and bold—he read the 23rd Psalm, and was asked by a few retired sheriffs to join the force after he got out of the Marines. Chuck’s sheriff’s ring was put on his finger right before he was buried.

Aaron shed tears many times. I don’t think he ever did in front of the Marines, but in front of us, they flowed freely.

All of the Austin’s had loud voices and Aaron was no exception. It’s one of the things his Gunny Sgt. will always remember about him. Aaron was loud and he loved to talk. He ran his trap a lot when he probably should have kept quiet. He was still a Lance Corporal for a reason—he didn’t suck up, got caught at trying to suntan out in the desert, always up to something. He was never afraid to see if “he could get by with it.” I’m sure he wasn’t disrespectful, but he’d rather be busy, having fun, that kind of thing. But he was Gung ho and strong, and that’s what made it work for him. He was proud of his accomplishments and wanted more. In his personal effects, he had a set of Corporal insignia—I knew he’d been ready to pin it on for a while. He loved leadership and sought it.

He was fun-loving, always full of laughter and on the go. He loved family holidays and get-togethers, BBQ’s, parties, that kind of thing.

He loved that machine gun. I mean really. While he hated to read or study, he could when it came to that gun. He knew it through and through, and although he was the Team Leader, he liked to be on it himself.

Greatest trait: Love & loyalty
Hardest trait: Jealousy—and he’s loved women since he was a little bitty guy!
Upset the most by: someone messing with someone he loved—that’s what happened that day.

He will always be so very, very missed by all of us, because he was so fun. A ham, a show-off. I’m sure, like the rest of us, he had his own fears, but after he got older, he always faced them. When he was young, he was scared of dogs and he was my blanket-sucking baby. He had his blanket until he was 11, and when someone made fun of him at that age, he threw it away—before that, he’d just hide it.

He got an American pit bull 6 years ago. He loved Hennessy. Hennessy slept with him, rode with him…he just loved who he loved.

As a young teen, he liked sagging, ear piercing, gangster music, that kind of thing, but that disappeared after he joined the Marines. He grew into a man and I’ve heard him remark when he’d try on a large shirt or pants, “Naahh, that looks too gangish…”

He liked all kinds of music, but country began to win out. He loved Texas, and even told someone in front of me, “Man, I even get chill bumps when I fly in and see the cotton trailers.”

Well, I hope this helps, and if I left out something you need to know, just ask and I’ll tell you if I can.

Be blessed!
De’on

P.S. I will forward you a picture of the sign they have out in front of the machine gunners school at Pendleton. They named it after him. Also, on the 10th of November, the Marines’ Birthday, I will attend a ceremony in which the Lea County Marine Detachment here will be changing their name to the Aaron C. Austin Post- Lea County Marine Corps League Detachment 1185.

Do I sound like a proud momma? I am. I’ve always been. Spoiled him rotten. My name for him was my “Precious Perfect Son.”

Lord, how I miss all that!

Take care!


**


So, I still will “show” Aaron in the stories, but in case I die, or you die, I do want you to know Aaron.

It’s very late. But I’m waiting to hear something.

More links. Yikes! I was supposed to do that. I’m an administrator on our blog now. I despise the technical end of things, so if you see drive-bys on our blog, think nothing of it. War’s hell.

Steve wrote this article:

amarillo_com Local News 'Sunray loved him' 05-09-04_files

Pendleton, this one.
http://www.usmc.mil/marinelink/mcn2000.nsf/0/D128847E5A1D81AD852570530050E5AD?opendocument




Love. Much, much love and gratitude to all those Forward and Rear!

De’on

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

i wish i could write great stuff and tell you how much it means to us what you say. we all thank you a lot and reading your blog boosts our spirit. it's killer.

Gunz Up

De'on Miller said...

You can write! Start with a journal and a thesaurus. Record your thoughts using the senses, "show" what you see, hear, taste. You are in the middle of something very big, honey, and in the middle of all its history, its origin. Your words are important, for you, your family and the children you'll have. And practice. And read. I can "feel" the desire to nurture that "wish" into something fruitful. Just start. No one even has to know. But just think if people had never recorded all the rich history we have thus far. Besides it's cathartic.

Does anyone know whose day it is to watch Steve and my "marine from Iraq"??? I haven't heard from them.

Semper Fi, Lance Corporal Graves. I love you and look forward to wordy word wars with you! :)